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Topics - Polari

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General! / A concise, (almost) spoilerless walkthrough
« on: March 22, 2008, 07:17:17 pm »
When I first played IWBTG, there were a few times I wanted to ask someone "I'm stuck - but don't give me any details, just tell me where I should go next". This walkthrough attempts to do exactly that. I mean, answer that question, not ask that. Hopefully it will help someone.

First of all, use 'S' to skip cutscenes. As of writing this, it still isn't mentioned in the how-to-play, and you WILL want to do that in a couple of places later. Also, while it's not strictly necessary to do stuff exactly like I say, I highly recommend this order for your first playthrough.

Start by going up from the first screen. If you get to the game over -room (you'll know it when/if you see it), yes, it's a dead-end. The correct path is to another direction from the screen with your last save point. From there just keep going onward until you teleport back to the beginning.

Next, go left from the first screen. After a boss fight, in the next screen after the save point, there are two paths you can take. Pick the more obvious one going forward. Keep going until you're back in the beginning again. Now tackle that other path. The fastest way to get there is to teleport to that boss right before the junction (you should know or at least guess how by now), or you can go down from the first screen and through a couple of rooms you'd otherwise miss. Your choice.

After finishing that path, you'll enter the next area. From now on it will be straigthforward with only a couple of places that might confuse you, and which I can't describe without going into detail. Spoiler tags follow.

In the
Labyrinth of The Guy
, there are
several dead-ends with magikoopas and one correct path onward. If you can't seem to find it, just check all the possible screens you can exit to. The real exit is surprisingly the one that's hardest to get to. Draw a map if you can't figure it out otherwise.
Finally, in the very end,
yes, you can use the EVIL save point, you just need to shoot it a few times first. Even IWBTG isn't sadistic enough to make you go through that tower every time you die against The Guy.

So... that's it. Suggestions welcome. Feel free to distribute if you liked it.

General! / Why IWBTG is so awesome - a mini essay
« on: February 02, 2008, 05:41:35 pm »
A modern videogame is an interactive experience. The game consists of around twenty ten eight five hours of quality gameplay, and it's only purpose is to keep you entertained for that period. If you screw up, you'll maybe lose a hitpoint or something. If you can't make progress by yourself, the game will gently nudge you forwards, tell you what to do, and maybe make that part easier. Easy and comfortable.

It wasn't always this way. Games used to be a challenge. And an evil one at that. If you screwed up even slightly, the game would kill you, take all your stuff, spit on your corpse, and make you go through the whole level again. Which was of course harder than before because your weapon just went from a doomsday device to a peagun. Oh, and you had two tries left, after which it was really game over. No checkpoints. No save points. No nothing.

That might sound intimidating, but most importantly, the game was fair. It never broke its own set of rules, and you could get better at it. You'd gradually get further in the game and eventually beat it, giving you a sense of accomplishment that felt better than a few hours of safe and polished gameplay ever could.

That, my friends, is what IWBTG is about. It's incredibly hard. The very first screen in the game will kill you several times. But you'll get through. You'll encounter bosses that make all the previous obstacles seem like child's play. They can be beaten. Eventually you'll find yourself up against the final opponent and let me tell you, it will take quite some time before you'll best him. But if you persevere, you will make it. And man, you'll feel so good afterwards.

That is what you'll strive for. Not just playing the game, beating it. Are you a man enough to rise up to the challenge?

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